May 2012
2 posts
Can someone hear me cry. Cus it’s never gonna be what I’m feeling. I need someone to talk to. Please just hear me. Understand me.
Then I made the shittiest decision.
Now I try but it’s still awful.
Maybe the problem is my honesty.
I should just shut up.
April 2012
8 posts
how do u open up to someone that announce your emotions.
I’m keeping my mouth shut. swear.
bite your tongue, swallow your emotions and walk.
Just believe one day, it will sink away.
It hurts.
I’m going crazy. I really am..
Someone help..pls.
I wonder if I made the right call.
Someone just please make her stop.
I wonder how u did it. I need the courage, I’m tired just so tired. I’m wanna go somewhere safe. Somewhere I can be perfect so people would stop leaving me.
I’m going crazy. Im going nuts about this world.
How do we remain sane? Is that why u did what u did.
Feeling like shit tonight and you’re no where to be found..
Then again I should have never expect.
March 2012
2 posts
Have you ever run a marathon?
Get tired of running. Somewhere along the line, you just lose it. And probably there’s two ways to it. You either stop or speed up!
Whatever goes on your mind that moment can be hilarious. The darkest place or heaven. I wish I can explain better.
There’s this point where you can’t breathe because you don’t know why anymore. What were you running for?
And you stop....
Can someone please spare me and see the good in me.
The things I do.
Why do you play the game, why does tears seem to win, why does big words seem to rock the world.
Isn’t it the actions that is important.
Why do I always care all the time even when they run.
Arghhhhhh
February 2012
1 post
I don’t know to laugh or cry. Truth hurts but lies don’t?
December 2011
4 posts
Im damn disappointed, it’s like I lost half my heart
No not even the basic I should expect.
Let go, I’m gonna be who I was.
Let’s party lets go crazy..
Today I realise, you are all you got.
Hohoho merry christmas.
Yesterday was amazing and now I’m lying in my bed one last time..
I don’t know what to pack or what not to..it’s painful..and I’m standing here alone thinking why did it come to this..
So where do I go now? Where do I live?
You know the funny thing is that when someone slaps me, I just calmly sit there. When someone tell me they just cheated, I send them home. When they have a bad day, I rush over.
But when I’m like a time bomb, where are they?
No no don’t get me wrong, it’s my choice and I just bite my own ass again.
November 2011
1 post
You moved on!
That made history! I never felt so good.
I look back and I just wanna laugh! How silly.
There I was upset over nothing! The day you went behind and do the things you did, i left.
And I just got so carried away with winning. (ya a flaw no more!)
I got myself a great education and I didn’t feel happy. So silly.
You laugh and smirk while I run away from school? And you laugh at how I...
October 2011
5 posts
Working life
The feeling is different, is like you get up each morning doing what you have to do. Its a constant worry of your performance, whether you’ll make or break it. You wonder would you get to the top, you wonder if it’s worth the time. But you keep going.
And at this hour, I greet my love, friends and family goodnight. I miss them yet I don’t have time. I wanna spend so much time...
Love pushes us to the limit,
We jump we run we hide.
It runs with fear, it runs with doubts, it runs with hurt.
It doesn’t stop, it keeps pushing.
For what it’s worth, we fight.
For just that one minute worth of laughter.
I’m in love, I wanna do it all over again.
But..would I be able to take the fall again.
Oh..that pain…
Round purple flowers!
I’m so in love, I’m gonna explode.
I wish I was better, I wish you knew.
I’m so in love with you.
And for the first time in my life,
I’m in love with just one, my best friend.
Who would have thought, the last would be my best friend. Who would have thought, I would die in the arms of my most trustworthy friend.
How would I have know.
September 2011
2 posts
I'm A CHILD! :)
Whattt up! So its like finding jobs everyday (nah half the time I’m doing other things) but it seems like I really wanna work. Haha.. Yup gonna step up and get some money!
Spend the whole day at home waiting for my love! Cooked, talk, love! Perfect combi!! Funny how baby taught me how to walk like a girl! Since even a bra wouldn’t help ditch off the fact.
Ya..so much laughter so...
And if I could, I would have speed things up.
And if I knew, I wouldn’t have waste time.
B, I just wanna spend all my fucking time with you!
August 2011
2 posts
And yes I’ll love you and you only. Yes, I’ll not take this baggage along cause no way I’m gonna ruin another love. Yes I’ll learn to be understanding. Yes I’ll learn to be a bigger person. Yes I’ll learn to know what’s worthy and what isn’t..
Baby, I’ve been a fool. Your understanding and love makes me wanna be someone better, for you for...
My love loves to talk nonsense when she’s tired! And she’s fucking annoying…she does the weirdest things on earth..
And I seriously wonder why her!
;)
July 2011
10 posts
reality freaks people out..
So, this is a working relationship? So, how do one grow? So, how did one learn?
Its scary, one month and fate will decide. Okay, honestly I rather be a student but I can’t deny the fact that reality is tempting. For years, we go through love with education. We spend countless of days together and time isn’t quite the issue. Now, I’m thrown into this world that doesn’t...
knowing or acting?
I think along the way I lost my sense,
I think along the way I gave in to pride,
I think along the way I lost graciousness,
I think along the way I gave in to arrogance,
I think along the way I lost me..myself.
And I think along the way I’m going to be fine.
Do you know I miss you? Do you know you hurt me! Do you know all it takes its a sorry!! :(
Did they ever tell you that when you free fall there’s rocks below?
Sometimes I love love too much yet hate it way...
You know how long it takes to fly, you get your life under control fly around like a bird. Everything you want, you do. If it pleases you, you can run, you can jump..
Then they say love is wonderful, it is. How someone can come in and you lost all control.. Suddenly overnight your world is upside down..
There’s no I’m happy, its we’re happy.. Suddenly someone is in control...
365 days..
where the nightmare begin. the blood, the siren, the pain.
you’re evil, selfish, mean, self-centered..
one last..
its true you know we die with a cold heart, its true ive been there.
I've fell in love with my best-friend, but I know...
Greetings from korea.. I miss my baby… Can’t seem to enjoy this country..
Nothing seems to wipe off the smile on my face.. I love you, baby. :)
June 2011
1 post
11th day in thailand.
May 2011
6 posts
wow, life has been crazy.
the min my paper ended (19may), i had a great celebration at changi beach club (20-22). then i left from there to an extremely awesome trip to kl (22-24).
been busy, trying my fucking best to meet everyone of friends. and now im sitting here packing my luggage, leaving in 4hrs.
bkk (27-17jun), maybe tioman (24-29), korea (7-15jul), bintan (16-19jul)
im going crazy...
“Because I don’t live in either my past or my future. I’m interested only in the...”
– The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho (via jeansandsneakers)
But..
‘Through this time, I realize I’ve fallen in love with you, in love with the ideas of being with you, in love with your existence, your sweetness, your baggages, your heart, your everything.’
life is good.
2nd day of celebrations after an exhausting week of intense studying. A surprise short getaway, two bottles of wine, cheese, ham, ciggs, sweet breeze and wind
I’m excited, its a new beginning. :).
Interesting? We cheat, we lie, we beg, we ate, we...
Today I’ve heard something shocking, I can’t speak of it so its best if its here. A three year rs, looking happy looking good but this fool has been playing.. Oh that’s jus not the worst part… Got caught red handed (the worst possible scene) and still continue.
Sometimes I wonder why people stay and torture themselves? Doesn’t it hurt to lie beside someone u...
my tears flow the minute I came home, an empty house. worst than anything I’ve ever felt, I miss my family. and to hear my mum tearing on the other end of the line kills me. ten more days..
I don’t think I can study or work abroad..
April 2011
3 posts
I know, I know.
But just this miracle.
Please, pleaseeee…
Somedays its hard to believe its ever gonna happen again, somedays I wish it doesn’t have to ever happen. Somedays I think I’m a coward, somedays I admire my own guts. Somedays I wanna be selfless, somedays I just became selfish. Somedays I wish time would turn around, somedays I wish time would fast forward.
Somedays like all other days, we still don’t really know what we...
I find myself biting my tongue. and for the longest time, I’m sitting on the edge. Just so you know, if I blow up its the ugliest you’ll ever see.
March 2011
4 posts
2 funerals back to back, 7 days of staying up and care taking has reminded me of the pain I went through last year. and it took away whatever smurf that was left in my mind.
I’m so done with this, I need a miracle.
Its this moment that you wait so badly for. Once, this didn’t seem like its possible like as though this would never come. And life just surprises you, when it comes it just blow your mind away. And its at this moment you realize how good life could be if you allow yourself to be free.
“The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get up eight times.”
– Paulo Coelho (The Alchemist) (via youfallyoufly)